“I love myself. the quietest. simplest. most powerful. revolution. ever. -ism"
(the beautiful words of nayyirah waheed)
Anyone who really knows me, knows this: I absolutely LOVE love. Giving it away feels like my resting state— to my clients, my people, my pooch, a person on the street.
But a trickier aspect of love — this "self-love"— has been a much harder and more nuanced relationship to cultivate. It requires an enormous level of self-honesty and ongoing self-forgiveness and, most often, a fierce commitment to self-compassion. It's been a lifetime of practice. (Yep, definitely still practicing).
I've learned that when you can root out the self-judgements that are propagating your pain, you can transform yourself.
And the thing that transforms you, the thing makes everything work in any self-discovery or healing process, is (self) love.
Self-love is the kind of love you can’t bullshit or hide from.
The kind that reminds you who are and why you are deserving of all you desire.
The kind with the power to wrap your heart in wholeness no matter how broken it may feel.
The kind you get the privilege to give AND receive.
Turns out, in a world that basically hard wires us to question our worthiness, it’s also pretty revolutionary.
Self-love is the foundation for worthiness (and self-care, and self-acceptance, and pretty much everything else for that matter). And it all expands from cultivating a place within your heart that's willing to bring love to the vast range of who you are, in your most exquisite parts and most painful places.
So as Valentine’s Day approaches tomorrow, I’m hoping you’ll add some self-care and self-love into the collective love fest. Start by asking yourself, "What's one thing I can do to be kind to myself today?" And then listen within.
Because you deserve that kindness. Because you are worthy of what you may so easily give others before ever thinking to give it to yourself. Because more love creates more love creates more love.
And we all certainly need more of that.